Help!

I have a dilemma, people. Here is my conundrum: I'm getting a bonus at work shortly, and will of course be spending at least some of it on shoes. I am conflicted about which pair of shoes to get, though; I'm torn between the following:

 Old Navy Faux-leather Cross-strap Wedges - $29.50

OR

Steve Madden Tuxxedo Oxfords - $69.95

There are several conflicting things I'm trying to take into consideration. First, which would I wear more? I already have wedges, and own nothing like the oxfords, but I can think of more places I would wear the wedges. Second, price. The wedges are less expensive, decidedly so, but I can get free shipping for the oxfords and, as already stated, I already own wedges. Third, I would like to try out a look outside my style comfort zone, and I am loving menswear-inspired clothing for women lately. I have also tried my darndest to find cheaper brown, detailed, lace-up oxfords but to no avail. Target has some awesome black ones that are currently out of stock online because they are THE least expensives ones I could find (or anyone could find, it appears). The problem is, I don't want black, I want brown. Here are the outfit inspirations for the shoe choices:

Outfit courtesy of Uber Chic for Cheap

For any of you who are wondering, I'm buying that necklace with or without the wedges. It's just too awesome. I will also be styling the oxfords minus the fedora and the oversize glasses; those stray just a bit too far outside by style comfort zone.

So...which pair do I get? Which pair would you get? Why?

The dangers of vicarious living

When I graduated from college last August, I was quite thrilled about the prospects of no homework, no studying, and no finals. I actually looked forward to just working. However, I quickly realized that my academic life, while hectic and stressful, had filled my life with purpose and kept me busy - and that I now lacked that purpose. But, da-da-da-dum {imagine a trumpet fanfare}, my husband's foray into academia offered me a unique opportunity: I could live vicariously through him! I would be able to participate in that which gave my life meaning for so long without any consequences or responsibility. I could help edit papers, study for tests, crack the whip over David's self-proclaimed procrastination-addicted head, and do it virtually risk-free. What could possibly go wrong?

Well, let me tell you what could go wrong. Let me inform you of the unintended consequences of this mentality. My naive little brain was only focused on the wonderful things of college: the obtaining of new knowledge, the expansion of mental horizons, the shaping and molding of ideas and opinions and thoughts. I've only been out of school for 8 months and I already have collegiate amnesia, a common but extremely vexing affliction that causes a graduate to forget about the grueling work of academia and only remember the rosy parts. Those of you still in college have probably experienced this malady in the form of your parents/relatives when you talk about how difficult your classes and schoolwork are (I know I did); they give you an infuriatingly patronizing look that says, "Oh, it can't be that hard." That's right, my friends. They have collegiate amnesia.

Anyway, back to the matter at hand. Apparently, collegiate amnesia sets in fast. Fortunately, I have a cure! It's very simple: spend 24 hours pretending you're a college student with a HUGE term project due the next day that involves organizing massive amounts of newspaper, cutting, gluing, filing, and beautifying, and you have approximately 12 hours to complete it. That's what I did last night. With David. Until about 3:30 a.m. Did I mention I have work at 8:30? Nothing brings back the reality of college like staying up ridiculously late/early trying to get a big project done and suffering from severe sleep deprivation for the rest of the day.

So, I am happy to announce that I am cured of my collegiate amnesia, at least temporarily. I no longer have any desire to be a student. After last night, I'll take my mundane but easy 9-5 desk job, thank you.

I think perhaps my attitude towards this blog reflects my attitude about life in general right now: I keep waiting for something exciting to happen to post about. I keep waiting for something wonderful and fantastic to fall from the sky and land on my head Newtonian-style and give my life meaning. I fear that I've fallen into the "My life will be great when {fill in the blank}" trap. I think this could be one of the unintended consequences of goals: we focus so much on reaching the end that we miss the middle entirely. And I have lofty goals - goals for me, goals for David, and goals for us as a family. But I don't want David to be so focused on graduation that he misses the wonderful experiences of college, and I don't want to be so focused on attaining my personal goals that I underappreciate the relative simplicity and ease of my current life. I want to be happy now, right now, without any conditions or stipulations; I don't want to wait to be happy. So, I am determined to notice the little things that give my life meaning and make me happy now - the minutia, the seemingly inconsequential occurrences and accomplishments that actually create my life more that the grand but rare events.

Here is a brief list of said recent occurrences and accomplishments:

• David got a raise at his job
• I might get a raise at my job
• This past week, we planted the seeds in little plastic cups that will (hopefully) eventually populate our nascent garden
• On Saturday, we leveled off the garden, turned over all the dirt (sidenote: next year, I think I'll save my body and rent a Roto-tiller or some such contraption), mixed in compost, and installed four out of the seven 8'-tall posts that will support the perimeter of our garden. Whew!
• I found satin leopard-print flats at DSW that were 70% off - total damage, $11.98.
• David and I saw "Sherlock Holmes" at the dollar theater on Friday. My favorite part? Rachel McAdams' makeup; within 24 hours, I was at home attempting to recreate her smokey purple eye. :)
• I dyed my hair warm, dark brown this past week and, as I noted on my fashion blog, I already feel distinctly sassier. It did take two boxes of dye, as the first one turned out disastrously, but I managed to fix it and it's all good now.

There. I feel better already. Any suggestions about how to, to use a cliched phrase, appreciate the "journey" and not just the "destination?"

Happy (belated) St. Patrick's Day!

This year for St. Patrick's Day, I decided to do something a little creative: I decided to make a green dinner, one without the aid of food coloring, and one not involving the proverbial green eggs and ham, either. This is what I came up with:
 

I made baked chicken with pesto, Parmesan cheese, and pine nuts, roasted garlic asparagus, spinach spiral pasta, and lime Jell-O. Everything was absolutely delicious, even more so on our plates:

 What a cacophony of green colors are in that picture! Oh well. You make do with what you have, and St. Patrick's Day (and a wholly green meal) come but once a year!

Melancholy Musings

Today I have been reflecting on the protean nature of relationships. It only makes sense that even those that endure change over time, as people are the basis of relationships and people are nothing if not creatures subject to change. Experiences shape opinions and convictions; those that are shared may shape both parties together, or may shape them individually in very different ways. Experiences that are not shared make maintenance of the relationship all the more challenging, as relationships are built on commonalities. It is difficult to forge or save a relationship with someone with whom we share nothing in common, from favorite breakfast cereals to political leanings.

But perhaps not all relationships are meant to endure indefinitely. People we were friends with in high school can seem immature, ignorant, or downright weird after college (believe me, I've experienced this firsthand). Perhaps some are meant to come into our lives only for a season, to influence us then and there and then move on (I've also experienced this firsthand).

But above all other relationships, those we share with the people to whom we are related are perhaps the most complex and confusing. The convenience of friends is that when we discover that we no longer share anything in common, we can in essence say, "Well, it's been nice knowing you!" and walk away; that is not the case with family. Whether we want to our not, unless we're adopted, we will always have the commonality of blood. And because you will always have a relationship with these people, they are arguably the most difficult to get along with, for you simply cannot bid them adieu, even if you have nothing but your blood in common.

So what is to be done? How do you have a relationship with someone with whom you share nothing but common blood? I for one am not a fan of the sort of relationships where your conversation never progresses past the superficial questions we ask ourselves at work parties and neighborhood receptions, i.e. "How's school? What does your husband do? How are your kids/dogs/plants/in-laws/knees? What are you up to these days?" Unfortunately, in my case at least, I feel that many of my relationships with those to whom I am related are relegated to this banal level of superficiality, for we often share nothing else in common whatsoever. I am caught between a rock and a hard place: I cannot simply write them off, as I could someone not related to me, but at the same time, a deeper-level relationship seems all but impossible with them as we have no common interests or experiences.

This, I suppose, evidences the ever-changing nature of our relationships, even the ones that should endure. I will continue to strive for a happy medium; however, it seems there's more strife than striving sometimes.

I'm Not Dead Yet

It appears that I have taken a month-long hiatus from blogging. It's amazing how having blogger blocked by the powers that be at work will do that to you. :) In fact, I remember the conversation when I first informed my husband of this fact:

Rachel: "They disabled facebook and blogger at work."
David: "Oh yeah? That's no fun."
Rachel: "I know! What am I supposed to do to occupy my time at work now?"
David: "I don't know - work, maybe?"
Rachel: "Pfff." (Imagine a scoffing sound that means, "Whatever. Who actually works at their job?")

Sad? Yes. True? Also yes.

I've decided that instead of boring you with the intimate details of our lives over the past month or so, I'll give you a brief and by no means inclusive list of the goings-on in the Steed household:

• David has applied to the University of Utah and Westminster College here in Salt Lake City. He's been accepted to Westminster and the U is still processing his application. Thus, we're frantically trying to find ulterior sources of college funding that don't have interest rates or monthly payments. It can be done, I tell you!
• I got a promotion at work, which means that I may have to do some actual work at work in the near future. :) It's more of a gradual promotion, however, as I have to learn the duties of the position I am to assume from the person who currently occupies it if and when she ever decides to vacate it. It's complicated, don't ask.
• We still have two cats, two birds, a bunny, three houseplants, and an evil rat that lives outside and has recently shredded all of the sound-barrier lining on the inside of our Jeep. (Not the inside inside, but the inside that has the engine, battery, etc. Is there even a name for this place? I'm calling it the car's mechanical cavity. It sounds official enough).
• For Valentine's Day, David and I made stuffed mushrooms, spinach and artichoke dip, lobster tails, New York steak, garlic mashed potatoes, and molten chocolate cake. If it sounds expensive, we calculated its price to be about half of what we would've paid had we gone out to eat. It was worth every penny, too.

That's about all I can think of. Our lives sadly are not that interesting to anyone but us. :)

I will try to write more often, but I can't make any promises as to the frequency of the posts; now that I can't blog at work, who knows when I'll find time outside of work to do it. :)

Once Upon a Time...

While reading the newspaper today, I came across a very small article that stated that one could win a night's stay in the Presidential Suite at the Grand America hotel and dinner for two if they submitted an account of their "love story" under 1,000 words. Having nothing better to do at work this morning, I crafted the following piece. I hope you enjoy it as much as David and I do. Even if we don't win the contest, I enjoyed myself at work for at least an hour writing it. :)

The Story of the Prince David and Princess Rachel

Once upon a time, in the far away magical land of the Lake of Salt, there lived a beautiful princess named Rachel. She was small and quiet, and had blonde hair and a fondness for unicorns. Like most of the kingdom's children, she attended a nearby school, and on her first day of kindergarten, she met the prince David. He was also small and blond, but not at all quiet. They quickly became friends and delighted in doing the things small children enjoy.

As they grew, they continued to play together. Many of the other girls were mean to Princess Rachel, but Prince David was always kind to her, letting her play basketball with the boys and act as the refueling station for his fleet of Startrek ships.

Upon entering junior high, Princess Rachel and Prince David's friendship began to develop into something more. Unbeknownst to one another, each harbored a secret love for the other. Sadly, the kind Prince David moved away and began attending a different school. Heartbroken though she was, Princess Rachel mustered the courage to continue on without him.

As the years passed, Prince David grew into a handsome youth, and the Princess Rachel an equally beautiful maiden. Their paths crossed occasionally throughout their adolescence, once at a wedding celebration and again on a trip to the land of the Yellow Stone. As each graduated from high school, they went their separate ways to schools of higher education.

It was at another wedding celebration that they fortuitously met once again. Princess Rachel was there to congratulate her favorite nurse from her childhood on her marriage, who also happened to be Prince David's cousin. Unbeknownst to Princess Rachel, Prince David was there and had spotted her from a distance. Princess Rachel did not immediately recognize Prince David, but had been for some time admiring his fine suit and ruggedly handsome features. Being a gentleman, Prince David reintroduced himself at once, and the pair resolved to renew their friendship.

As before, the friendship of Princess Rachel and Prince David grew into romance. They spent many wonderful evenings together, riding Prince David's roan stallion or walking through the Lake of Salt kingdom. However, the prince and princess were destined to be parted again. Prince David was called by the King to serve in a dangerous land filled with dragons, serpents, and all sorts of other horrible creatures. He would be gone awhile, but promised Princess Rachel he would return. She promised she would wait for him. And so she did. She wrote to him, and he to her, each looking forward to the day when they could be reunited forever.

After serving the King gallantly, Prince David did return. One night some months later, all their friends were gathered at a festival to watch pirates duel. The kind and handsome Prince David suddenly knealt down on one knee and gave Princess Rachel a box to open. The Princess Rachel at first refused, suspecting a trick, but Prince David persisted. Willing to oblige her love, Rachel opened the box to find a ring. The Prince David and Princess Rachel became betrothed, and all their friends celebrated.

Following strenuous planning and coordination, Prince David and Princess Rachel were married in a beautiful white castle, and journeyed to a southern kingdom to begin their lives together at last.